The Last Few Days

Thursday:  Bill and I celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary.

***pausing for claps and cheers***

The Day Before Thursday: I cried.  I cried because as I looked back on the last 15 years I felt as if I haven't accomplished much.  Oh sure, I gave birth to five children.  Big whoop.  If you only knew how grumpy I was in the early years  the first 10 or 11 years of our marriage, you would cry, too.  I thought about how nice Bill has been every day of the last 15 years and I felt guilty and unworthy.

Thursday Night: Bill gives me my gift.  It was gooooood.  Like, "bling" good.  (now would be a good time to mention that I am not usually materialistic, but I am a girl and all girls like bling.  Ok, moving on.)

Saturday: I was able to forget about my self-loathing feelings for a while until I watched an interview on Fox and Friends Weekend that drudged up what I think has been bothering me a lot lately.  The woman being interviewed said she was regretful for not keeping her hands in the corporate world while she stayed at home raising her children.  She is now an empty nester and has lost her ability to easily get back into the work force.

I completely understood where she was coming from.  I had a career I enjoyed once B.K. (before kids)and it may be impossible for me to go back to it; but that wasn't what bothered me.  I couldn't quite figure it out because she seemed nice and I felt bad for her predicament.  I couldn't get her out of my mind.

Sunday: "Take up your cross" was the message of the mass.  I sat there with tears in my eyes as I looked at my good friend a few pews in front of me.  The very friend who spent the last 15 months getting diagnosed and treated for cancer all while being pregnant, mothering her other two boys, and delivering a healthy baby.  None of that was in her plan when she left the teaching world to get married and start a family.

After Bill's mass (we went separately) he mentions that the choir sang the song "You Alone" and makes me listen to it on Youtube.

Sunday Afternoon: Flipped through a book a friend of mine left at my house.  The book is called, The Domestic Church: Room by Room by Donna-Marie Cooper O'Boyle.  I hope I am not breaking any copyright laws by writing the following lines, but I had to share these beautiful words from the page I stopped on.

It would be a lie to convey that a mother's daily life is only one of blissful loving embraces and constant "warm fuzzies."  Motherhood is intrinsically beautiful, but while she is in the trenches with whiny demands, diapers, overflowing hampers of dirty laundry, and the constant refilling kitchen sink, a mother knows that the feeling of love for her family may not always emerge easily in every circumstance.  It will, at times, come through the sacrafice of giving of herself and her decision to remain faithful to her vocation.  A mother decides to love and to continue to love her family in God's plan for her salvation and the salvation of her family.   Through a mother's loving service, God is at work sanctifying her soul when she thoroughly surrenders her heart to his holy will.

 
Monday: That lady is on Fox and Friends again!!  She looked sadder this time.  Maybe it was because this time another woman was alongside of her also being interview and patting herself on the back for staying at home and starting her own business while doing it.  I'm sure that made the first woman feel just great.

I googled this first woman and read her post where she listed 9 reasons why she had remorse on staying home and losing herself.  It was then that I realized what bothered me.  All the reasons were selfish. You can find it here.  I wish I could paste the above book excerpt next to each one of her reasons.  Maybe she would feel better.  I should send her the book.

I was trying to formulate some kind of cohesive post relating all of this and get a good "meaning of life" lesson in here somewhere, but it didn't come.  It is all over the place and probably doesn't make much sense.
  
Tomorrow: Change latest blog post title to "Random Thoughts."


 


  

5 Things About Me

I am lucky to have different groups of friends.  There are lifelong friends, old work friends, mom's groups friends, church friends, etc .  However, there is one particular group of women I call friends even though we have never met.  They are my "blog friends." 

If I weren't a blogger and heard that term "blog friends", I wouldn't understand and I would probably think it was creepy.  But I am a blogger and I get many sweet comments and emails from these women and they make me smile on a daily basis.

Imagine my surprise in the last couple of weeks when I was given an award by one, and tagged to play a game by the other.

My one friend Nancy, from the Breadbox Letters, gave me a Liebster Award. Here is a description of this award.


The Liebster Award is given to up and coming bloggers who have fewer than 200 followers.  From what I understand, liebster is German for: "sweetest," "kindest," "nicest," "dearest," "beloved," "valued," "endearing," and "welcoming."

*Blush*  Thank you, Nancy!

My other friend Billie Jo, from Afternoon Coffee and Evening Tea, tagged me today to play a game.

With both of these, the idea of sharing random thoughts about myself was part of the fun and games. I am totally scaling back on all the "rules" but was able to come up with 5 pieces of information that are totally useless to you, but I will share anyway.

Here I go:

1.) I have nice feet.  I love my feet because I have high arches, which makes them pretty.  I would show you a picture of them, but I fear you may not agree.

2.)My favorite snacks are Cheez-Its and Pringles.  However, if I'm feeling particularly energetic, I will make myself a plate of Ritz crackers with cream cheese and an olive on top.  

3.) I must wear shoes while blow-drying my hair. 

4.) One of my biggest pet peeves is when people say, "I could care less" instead of "I couldn't care less."  The first way is wrong if your point is to get across to people you don't care at all.  If you "could" care less, you obviously care somewhat.  Right?

5.) In 8th grade our class had a field trip to Great Adventure.  While waiting in line forever at the Old Fashion Car ride, I fainted.  The first aid people came to my rescue, strapped me onto a gurney, loaded me onto a golf cart- with siren, and took me to the First Aid Center.  It was majorly embarrassing. (my good friend Rose rode with me and I will be forever grateful to her.)

Now, if I were playing the right way, I would "tag" others to play, but my mind is so tired after writing those riveting facts, that I'm going to call it quits.

I hope you all had a nice weekend.